Aut viam inveniam aut faciam

Life is like steps in a lesson of tango. Feet are lead by the instructor, trained to follow their every move, then given confidence and support to experiment and grow. The most important influence in my life has been a wonderful quartet of women. Their encouragement strengthens my character and amplifies my enthusiasm for writing.

I have known Irene since I first opened my mind to the idea of becoming a reporter four years ago, when my first daughter was nine months old. I stumbled upon the newsroom and instantly felt welcomed.  Tricia recognized my timid expression and graciously answered my questions about courses and prerequisites. I began to rethink my biochemistry major as I finished Marianne’s introduction to mass communications class.

 College costs add strain to my budget. Sometimes the pinch is so tight, I survive a day of hunger with fuel from Alicia’s graciously home cooked goods or a “community” peanut butter sandwich.

During every life-changing event Irene, Marianne, Tricia and Alicia were there, nudging me forward.   Alicia was there with encouragement and helped me deal with my feelings of inadequacy when I first became a single parent. Marianne’s earnest support and positive attitude became my cornerstone and compass. Irene’s faith in me and my ability to persevere helped keep me sane when my personal situation felt like a roller coaster. With time, obstacles turned into stepping-stones. Setbacks morphed into moments of pause so I could reevaluate my goals and the direction I needed to take to get there.

Then, I received an enthusiastic welcome back this semester when I reenrolled in news writing practicum. It has taken me two years to return to the newsroom. I now work a weekday third shift. After work, I take public transportation to school and work in the newsroom as a staff reporter and calendar editor. Tricia shows me one-on-one how to use InDesign. Each tip is a new short cut or simpler method and helps me become a better editor.

These wonderful women have shown me how to forge my own path. Aut viam inveniam aut faciam is Latin for "I'll either find a way or make one," from Hannibal. This phrase embodies all I work toward and fight to achieve. Collegiate success begins with a planted seed, a yearning for something more from life. Success then grows with the sweat of persistence. Persistence  fuels the desire to be the best I can be.

Irene’s email signature says it all, "Disregard the possibility of failure," -Judge Leon Higginbotham Jr.­­­­

I feel honored to have such a loving support group and the best cheerleaders I could have ever asked for.

Photos are getting better

The semester is almost over and it's definitely crunch time. I'm heading to the missions by bicycle this morning to take photos for the scenic assignment. I'll upload pictures to the Fur Kids Photography fb page.

I just recently had a portrait session with A., a friend from UIW. We had a lot of fun and she was great to work with. I can tell my subject positioning is getting better, I still have to work on proper lighting, and figuring out where to put a subject's hands. Also, my session with A. made me realize that every subject should wear makeup, at least a mineral makeup base. Not to hide blemishes, per se, but to keep the forehead, nose and closest cheek from reflecting sweat. I loved her make up choices, subtle and natural.

Also, especially for her, I needed a minion... someone to hold a reflector to bring more light to her eyes. Her eyeshadow and mascara made her eyes darker than I'd hoped.  But overall, it was a great session and I am happy with the outcome.

Portrait session with A.

These three are my favorite.








Getting into the swing of things

I read a lot. Constantly.

Lately I have been reading a lot of nonfiction about story and feature writing. I absorb as much as possible and hope it will help me work past the hurdles of form and style when I write for The Ranger.



My first three stories for The Ranger are published.  http://www.theranger.org/



9/9/10       "Free admission with Alamo colleges ID"    
9/10/10     "Buffalo soldiers exhibit free with new ID"
9/17/10     "Move in blues continue in earth sciences"

M= the master of my camera

So a lot has happened since the beginning of the semester.

I began my photography course anticipating a routine structured around that of the last photography course I took a couple years ago.

On the first day of class I discovered that not only will my class by using only digital cameras, we would not be processing our own film or developing our own prints.

The professor said, "I'm preparing you for a professional business. There isn't a business around that still uses film and enlargers to create a final print."

So... no more fun times in the pitch black "box" trying to load film into the developer canister. No more endless shaking of fixer and developer.. just to finish with underdeveloped reels of film. No more chemicals, enlarger or timers. No more dodging and burning print after print of pearl paper. It makes sense, but is still sad.

Next class I brought my digital camera and wanted to show off the bells and whistles with my Canon T2i... and then it hit me. We will be using completely manual mode. I know it's for the best, but it frightens me. Up until today, I didn't know what Tv, M and P meant on my camera's dial. I took photos using the different icons, for portraiture, close ups, fast action, etc.

While my professor said that was good, he still said it's important to know exactly what you are doing so you can create the setting you want without having to fix the image so extensively in Photoshop. Suddenly all those bells and whistles are getting in the way.

My newsroom technician Tricia said, "M stands for Master of my camera."

It's like trying to break an addiction. Fully manual?!?

Figure out my own Fstops and shutter speeds?

EEEK!

168 hours in a week

One of my courses requires me to fill out an actual tally of  what I do during the day for one week's worth of time... So I realize now that I actually have negative hours, meaning I do much more than time should allow. Which probably means I forego sleep in attempt to get everything done. Maybe thats why I tend to feel tired.


With the first week done.. I've sized up trouble spots to the routine, Mondays are going to be rough, but otherwise happy with the class/work/family/sleep routine although I know it will get more hectic as the school year progresses. I have fit into my schedule photo shoots and setting up a table at flea markets to bring in more paying customers. I am struggling with making time for SCA events, since I use the weekends to create revenue. I have whittled it down now to one event per month, which saddens me because I love the game and the friendships I have created because of it.

It's hard to sleep during the day when I know outside my window the rest of the world is bustling along, creating a myriad of events and subjects I could write about.

creative photo output

I've still been working on pricing for our photography and videography services. This coming Sunday there is a bridal and quinceañera expo in town. Online research has brought back a lot of high figures, 2-5K, depending on, of course, the specific needs of the customer.

I have been researching where to go to get specialized items, ie. a personalized bound book of portraits, photo blankets, photo puzzles, etc. I have several ideas bubbling and can't wait to see how feesible they can be once a budget is finalized. 

Coolest new item of the day, I found several beautiful landscapes I can book for portrait sessions. One of them has bluebonnets during the spring!

We are ready and hungry for new photo opportunities, we love being behind a camera. If anyone needs our services, please do not hesitate to call or email us.

M's Quineañera, in the limo

At M's reception

close up of M's cake

Tropical Paradise

The trip to Florida was blissful. Yes, it rained every single day. Yes, it was more humid than the worst soup I'd ever had a chance to endure. And, impossible as it may seem, there really are worse drivers out there than the distracted-agressives here in San Antonio.

 Yet, I couldn't help but fall in love with the landscape- everything was a lush green. It was the kind of green I've only dreamed about... the kind created for movie sets or post cards. The trees seemed magical with their root tendrils reaching for the ground more than two stories below.

I think the best part was discovering this paradise with another sympathetic photographer. We spend hours at city and state parks taking photos of foliage, wildlife, seascapes and anything else that caught our eye. We filled the SD cards with video of ominous cloud movement, rolling waves, splashing kids, and pushy bicyclists.  

View of a tree while on a bridge at the University of Miami

Coconut Grove- University of Miami- HUGE beautiful Banyan tree in the middle of

campus, there were several of these trees scattered among their tropical landscaping.

Coconut Grove, city park- Awesome vertical photo
of a banyan tree's hanging tendrils

There was a sad feeling in my chest when our plane left Ft. Lauderdale, but I vow to return.

The New Routine

First day of class went well. It felt great to walk back into the newsroom at SAC, felt like coming home. The faculty and staff instantly recognized me and we had abbreviated life updates as students filed into the classroom for the first lecture. I look forward to the semester and even though I'm terrified of how well I can juggle all my responsibilities, I think this time I will pull through. I have an arsenal of good friends and supportive professors, plus my determination and dedication to my career as a writer.

I went to morning lecture at 9:30 expecting that to be the end of my first day, only to find out lab is on Mondays from 1 p.m. - 3 p.m., not on Friday at the same time (my night off work).  I worked the night before and, expecting to sleep right after class, stayed up all of Sunday running errands, buying last minute supplies, and prepping the kids for school.

After morning lecture I drove to the girls' school to drop of M's supplies.. and of course to check on them. M was already waiting in line for lunch... I dropped the supplies off in her homeroom and walked toward T's classroom. I wasn't worried about M adapting, she is naturally inquisitive, rule-abiding student.

As my slip resistant shoes squeaked down the hallway my mind began to race. After work, in transit to class, during class I'd glance at my phone waiting for the dreaded phone call, "I'm sorry, but Taylor needs more attention than we can give." Each step brought me closer to a possible child pick up.

I walked into an empty classroom and saw her class walking single file toward the playground. The room was filled with play stations; a wash basin filled with plastic dinosaurs, a miniature stovetop/cupboard combo complete with emptied food cartons, crayons and big chief tablets with bright scribbles on the page. I realized, this is the best environment for her and whatever it takes to keep her here... I am willing.

Grow Together

The new school year begins in less than five hours. It's the moment of truth whether or not my 3 year old can handle Pre Kinder. It's also the first day of my kinder's billingual immersion program. M's understanding of life is amazing, she has been a model big sister, showing T "the ropes." When I watch them interact with eachother I can see the awe in T's eyes as she mimmicks every little thing her sister does. I'm hoping she is ready to walk down her own path through the foreign lands of grade school.

I look forward to helping them on the road to adulthood

As for me, it's the first day back on campus, notebook, pen and camera at hand. I've signed up for a course in black and white 35 mm photography. I'm going to have the chance to shoot, develop and print my own photos. Plus I'm taking a news writing class, which will also be intense. I'm nervous but up for the challenge.

Just Keep Shooting

One thing I've learned... always carry my camera. I've lost many awesome photo ops because I didn't pay attention to the simple things: no camera, memory and battery life.

Second... keep shooting. The more photos taken, the more to choose from. I've had moments where what I thought was in focus ended up being fuzzy. It can be frustrating and avoided. When taking the "perfect" photo dont stop at one --or even five-- instead change the angle, depth of focus or subject concentration.

I relized the hard way that a bad photo cannot be fixed with Photoshop. Contrast, composition and tone can be modified with effort and experience however, if the original photo is blurred or has very high contrast, it would be easier and more practical to reshoot.

Don't hesitate to take a photo because you think it won't have enough lighting or there are too many other distractions in the frame. The photo below, a snapshot of a portion of the Alamo, was a "drive by" shot at midnight with a macro lens and no tripod. I assumed it wouldnt come out correctly and the lcd screen confirmed the image was very dark. I almost deleted it.

No Flash Necessary

So far, I have been shooting on location. A cloudy day, with the use of a reflector, creates the best effect. This is second indoor photo I've considered for public display, the first was the photo of my sister.

Normally indoor lighting comes from several different sources: sunlight, overhead light, lamps, and computer monitors. When more than one light source is used, the difference in color and intensity can add unfavorable hues to the final product.

There are ways to correct it, including using only one light source, or aiming the light sources toward the ceiling or a wall to help diffuse intensity. If using a flash, aim it toward the ceiling to even out the subject's exposure to light.  There are also more advanced options I can explain and show examples of later. 

My little model posing for the camera

Amusement and laughter

 

This beautiful ray of sunshine is my daughter, M. She loves the camera and although I don't play favorites, my camera does. It takes very little to make her smile and she's always a willing model. A simple cart and buggy ride turned into an "unlimited pass" adventure. Her giggles could be heard throughout the park and needless to say, she thoroughly enjoyed herself.

M's reaction to the cart and buggy ride is precious.

The Conquerer

 

This little bundle of energy has kept my hands full. I was sure she would fall and hurt herself while climbing or leaping from stump to stump.  Instead, she mastered the jungle gym. From start to finish I watched as she wiggled her body, swung her legs and slowly trekked from bar to bar. My amazing acrobat nonchalantly planted her feet on the solid yellow base and looked into the distance...

T, discovering the playground on her own terms.

Impromptu Portrait

My first photo entry is fittingly of my sister and our newest family member, Eden. I took this photo while she was in town a few months ago. She just happens to be back in town and I hope to spend a lot of time with her during the back to school frenzy. I want to take baby portraits, of course, but I also enjoy spending time with her. Her personality and energy lights up any room she enters. I'm sure she will be a great mom and I look forward to seeing both of them grow.

G. and her new baby girl

There is Always a First Time

Blogging conjours a nostalgic image of my grade school black and white speckled notebook.

My name is Jen, nicknamed "Maddie" which doesn't make sense unless you know about my hobbies. I am a mother of two, full time employee, journalism student, moonlighting photographer and freelance writer. I figure I must dive in and embrace blogging at some point.

I will be using this blog as the blackboard to log my ideas, research and discoveries about photography, freelance writing and other creative endeavors. I am breaking into the features freelance market, while going to school for an eventual bachelors in Journalism and Graphic Design. When asked about my major I tend to lump everything together in the melting pot called "me." My interests are in public relations, journalism, graphic design, advertizing, radio production and photography.

I'm working toward a goal of becoming a self-employed writer and photographer. I've built the blueprints, now it's time to put in the labor, love and frustration to follow through.